This Guy's Gettin' Shitty!

Why aren't advertisers at Corona jumping all over this?!?! They could have slogans like:

"Nothing gets between me and my Corona!"

"Corona is worth taking home, you can leave your Schlitz in the street."

"Grab a Corona, throw out your cell phone, relax, and leave your worries behind."

"Corona, so good, you'll shit yourself."

You get the picture. The sad part about this video is that the dude isn't even homeless. I mean, what homeless guy can afford white socks, nevermind 2 six packs of Corona?? Shits like $20 around these parts. That's a whole lot of nickels.

I love how he is doing this in front of 2 dudes laughing in his face, and he wasn't even phased. He finished, pulled up his drawers, grabbed his beer, and walked away. All in a days work.

Marshall Ain't Got Nothing on This Kid

Bravo sir. You have balls.

Song of the Moment

My favorite jam off the College Dropout. One of the best albums of all time in my opinion.

"If my manager insults me again, I will be assaulting him. After I fuck the manager up then I'm gonna shorten the register up"

Just Dancin By Myself Bro

This kid obviously isn't confined to the laws of gravity on this planet. Nothing will stop his eternal shuffling.

GQ's Babe of the Year

Babe of 2010?!?! I dunno, theres a few I could name over her....but I can't say I'm mad. She's just sexy all around. Plus, she was pretty funny on SNL recently. Now if she would only break up with Ryan Reynolds and teach me how to dougie. And by dougie, I mean bang me.

Is This The Best T Shirt of All Time?

Northwest "Beefing" Up Their Menu

Move over beef stroganoff! We serving dick up in here!

Blogcrates just booked 3 flights. To where, you ask? Doesn't matter.

Rufus: The Sling Shot Legend

Is this a joke? I mean, who is that accurate with a motherfuckin sling shot? Half of me is not that surprised, as I have a feeling he dropped out of the 2nd grade to perfect his craft.

NEW MUSIC

Kid Cudi - Marijuana



One of the only songs I like from the new Cudi album. It's actually really underwhelming, I was expecting a lot better. This track goes though, but then again with a title like that, how could it not.

"He's Fucking Dead, Bro!"

I mean, really guy? As the old adage goes, "fool me once shame on you, fool me twice and I'm a probably a drunk nitwit." Or it's something to that effect. Anyways, this could be the worst attempt at the skateboard ramp I've ever seen. What is that thing, 2 feet? Honestly, my 6 year old cousin could probably do that on one foot. Plus, how drunk is this guy? Looks like he been sleeping on Melnea Cass outside Boston Medical Center for 2 months. I mean, sheesh, you're making homeless people look terrible pal.

Faceplant of the Week

I thought rule number one of doing any kind of jump is to get enough speed. Distance over time equals velocity kid, distance over time. Someone needs to take an algebra class. Maybe if he didn't have to dodge Tent City, he could've pulled this off.

Call 555-GHOSTBUSTERS

Seems like just yesterday that Blogcrates and myself were little tykes running around with our proton packs catching "ghosts" in our back yards, running from the Marshmallow Man. We legit thought we were catching the ghosts. I miss those days being a retarded kid....But good news in grown up land: Dan Aykroyd is taking over the job of scribing Ghostbusters 3 from those lame guys who wrote Year One. This is good news to me because I thought the reason he got so fat was because he couldn't find work. Nice to know he is actually doing something. And by something I mean adding another piece to one of the most successful franchises of all time. The new movie will involve the same characters. This is good news to those who thought Bill Murray wouldn't do it. He just thought the original writers (the shmos who wrote Year One) were going to ruin it. Now that Aykroyd, and I assume Harold Ramis, are involved, things could change. Adds Aykroyd, "I think he was concerned that the writing on Ghostbusters 3 by these guys would not be up to standard, but I can tell you firsthand, I'm working on the script now and those two, Stupnitsky and Eisenberg, wrote Bill the comic role of a lifetime, and the new Ghostbusters and the old are all well represented in it...we have a strong first draft that Harold [Ramis] and I will take back, and I'm very excited about working on it."

I'm excited too Dan.

"If someone asks you if you're a god, you say, YES!"

Would You??

Introducing Rosie Huntington-Whiteley. This is the girl chosen to replace Megan Fox in the new Transformers movie. Really?? This is the best you could do Mr. Bay?? You're known for action, explosions and putting hot chicks in your movies. Lets take a look at your past leading ladies and you tell me what is wrong here.

Kate Beckinsale

Scarlett Johansson

Liv Tyler

Gabrielle Union

Megan Fox

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley

Being the highly regarded movie maker that I am, I feel like I should share my secret. Putting hot chicks in your sequels keeps the franchise alive. Replacing them with girls who's parents should have named them Shit Happens is no way to keep them going.

Let's go Michael Bay, you're on thin ice with me pal.

Snakes Can Kill You....and Put Giant Holes in Your Body

So yea, like most people, I'm terrified of snakes. Terrified. Like, 100 times worse than Indiana Jones. I would be totally cool with eliminating every single one of them off the face of the earth. Total annihilation. Even the non-venomous ones, because let's be honest, besides Bear Grylls, nobody can tell the fucking difference. "Ohhh that one's ok, the red stripe doesn't touch the yellow one." Gimme a freakin break. That being said, I have no explanation as to why this guy would keep one of the worlds deadliest ones in a tupperware container in his garage. Really bro? Snake charming?? That's what you chose to do with your life? And way to just nonchalantly toss him back in the box like he's not a deadly cobra. You deserve every square inch of that hole in your stomach. Maybe after this, you can go frolic with the lions in Africa.

New Music

BARS

Lupe Fiasco – S.L.R. (Super Lupe Rap)

Kik Messenger - The New BBM?

I just downloaded Kik Messenger and about to take it for a test drive on my Galaxy S. Kik Messenger is basically a free real time text messaging client for all. "By making Kik Messenger insanely fast, and by showing when a message has been sent, delivered, and read, texting with Kik feels like a face-to-face conversation." The best part about Kik Messenger is that you can interact with all phones and networks. I was a big fan of the BBM messenger client, which this is being compare to, but it was limited because you could only interact with BB owners. I'm excited to check this out.

For more details, hit up Kik Homepage

Or download the app from your mobile browser by going visiting: http://www.kik.com/m

New Music

Best GOOD Friday drop so far. J Cole absolutely bodies the beat.

Kanye West ft. Pusha T, CyHi Da Prynce, Big Sean & J. Cole – Looking For Trouble

Now That's What I Call Content

Complex is a great site for 'best of' and 'top' lists, this is no exception. I haven't had a chance to evaluate the entire list, but I'm sure people will have their criticisms. All I can say holy bars.

The 100 Greatest Lil Wayne Songs

Theo Walcott: Fastest Player in the World?

I'm having a tough time switching my allegiances from Arsenal to Liverpool after the NESV group's big coup. I can't help rooting for players like Fabregas, Walcott and Wilshire, this team is stacked with young talent.

Jam of The Week

This song is like my theme music right now. It's about time someone flipped this Modest Mouse song. Dope all around.



"All right, already
The show goes on
All night ’til the morning
We drink so long
Anybody ever wonder
When they would see the sun go
Just remember when you come up
The show goes on"

AMERICA, FUCK YEA!

Take that you terrorist assholes. They're running through the desert with AKs and we got Apache choppers with infrared to see them anywhere. Give it up already Taliban.

Brian Wilson: Demigod

Who's Hungry?

Hey snake, why don't you take a little longer to finish, huh?? The sound of that little bird dying isn't going to haunt my dreams or anything.

Brady Mayne Bieber Haircuts

this looks like its gonna be hilarious. Brady is the shit for doin this.

The Greatest New Comedy On TV

So... I don't know if people are just behind the 8ball, don't have IFC, or just aren't paying any heed, but the best new comedy on TV right now is "The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret." This zany comedy sees David Cross staring as Todd, a man self-destructing through a series of events arising from a combination of bad luck and his own poor judgment.

Each episode opens with Todd on trial in England for a list of crimes I can't recall nor care to recant, but you get my point, it's long. We then flash back to see how he's gone from working as an office drone in Portland, Oregon, to his present predicament. It all starts when Todd's abrasive, vulgar boss, Brent Wilts, played by Will Arnett, invests in Thunder Muscle, a toxic Korean energy drink, because he has been lead to believe "the English are nuts for the stuff." He taps Todd as his man to send across the pond to head up his UK sales department after overhearing our hero chew someone out in filthy, rude terms.

In reality, Todd is a temp with no sales experience who's probably never been outside of Portland. His profanity-laced tirade was actually being fed to him by a self-help tape; it wasn't targeted at anybody. But Todd, sensing an opportunity, awkwardly perpetuates his own myth by claiming his father was from Leeds (inspiration provided by a stray copy of the Who's landmark Live at Leeds). Brent doesn't question any of this, and soon Todd is bidding farewell to his "girlfriend" — who in fact slept with him once, when she was drunk, and has no recollection of the event — and leaving out two weeks' worth of food for his cat (which ends up backfiring hilarious in the last episode.) Once in London, Todd discovers a ludicrous amount of inventory and a sales staff consisting of one guy, Dave, whose chief function seems to be goading Todd into making an ass of himself. He finds a friendly face in a local barista named Alice, a sexy Brit if I do say, but her kindness is limited, though her obsession with molecular cuisine makes for some amusing references.

Five episode in and I am hooked. You should be too.

New Music Yo

Nicki Minaj-Romans Revenge (Feat Eminem) by CITYGEES.COM

I'm not really a big Nicki Minaj fan, but she brought in the big gun to spit some ill verses. Em kills it, per usual. Worth a listen.

BLOGRATES EDIT: This song sucks balls

BLOGRATES EDIT 2.0: Because C. Troy loves this type of junk, f.y.e. Rihanna f. Emimem - Love The Way You Lie Pt. 2

God Bless Shaq

Amazing. Just amazing. Somebody just sent this to me and I spit my Diet Coke all over screen once he started singing. The Celtics have the best team ever. He actually looks like that Fantasia chick. Thats how ugly she is.

Caster's Song of the Moment

Arguably the best hip hop album of all time. This song is just awesome all around. Props to RZA, probably the most underrated producer of all time.

Zach Galifinakis: Prop 19 Hero

Zach Galifinakis decided to light up a joint on "Real Time with Bill Maher" and the hippies couldn't be happier. What I thought was odd about this video is that Zach, the caring pot head he is, decided to pass it along and NOBODY took a hit.....not even doobie lover Bill. The lesson here is that unless you've been living in 1930 the past 50 years, pot is ok. It's not going to kill you, it's not a "gateway" drug, whatever that means, and it will certainly not make people more aggressive. I mean, really?? It mostly leads to funyuns and forgetting where you put shit. Heck it even makes Jennifer Lopez movies bearable. Well, maybe not, but you get what I'm trying to say.

This Is Just Awesome

What a play! I mean, it didn't count because of the penalty, but wow.

Caster's Top 10 Horror Movies

Halloween is upon us. Soon the streets will be filled with hoodlums, skanks, and little bedwetters running around while their parents pray they don't get hit by cars. I'm getting older and I understand that some people like to stay in and enjoy a horror movie. I'll give you 10 that absolutely scared the dick off me.

10. The Exorcist

- If you haven't seen this movie, then you must be 6 years old. This is one of the scariest movies of all time, and for good reason. Little girl possessed by the Devil. Always chilling. The head turning completely around was the first of its kind, and I think my dad says he still has nightmares.

9. Halloween (Rob Zombie version)

-Rob Zombies vision of John Carpenters character is extremely chilling. Film follows Michael Meyers as a child up to what he is today. Children that evil and violent are always scary.

8. Saw

-Just a well written, methodical thrill ride. Great start, beginning, and end. Lots of blood...oh and a saw....

7. Rosemary's Baby

- Roman Polanski's thriller is part satanic horror and part paranoid delusion. The Devil rapes Rosemary. Need I say more. Oh, and he's terrifying.

6. The Shining

-Stanley Kubrick's film about a father driven mad by inadequacy. Oh and Jack Nicholson is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too good at playing a psycho.

5. Scream

-This came out while I was in high school and I thought this was the scariest movie at the time. The first scene where Drew Barrymore is cooking the Jiffy Pop while being stalked still still gives me the chills. "What do you want?" "To see what your insides look like..." sheeeeet

4. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

- If you want to scared shitless by a chainsaw wielding manic with no face, heres the movie for you. What people don't realize is that the original is virtually a bloodless movie. If you want the gore, go with the new version. Plus, Jessica Beil is running around in a wet wife beater.

3. The Amityville Horror (original)

- This is on my list because no other movie scared me more when I was little, except maybe Aliens. The scene when the walls started bleeding made me pee a little.

2. The Descent

- Claustrophobic film that involves man eating creatures underground stalking women climbers. LOTS of blood and scary moments. Be ready to jump at any second.

1. Hostel

- This is my number one scariest movie of all time because its was the scariest movie I have ever seen. Talk about shit your pants scary. Eli Roth inadvertently created a new genre of horror that people started to call torture porn. Imagine backpacking through Europe when some cool guy comes up to you and tells you where the best place to go for sex and girls are, and the next thing you know you wake up strapped to a chair with some psycho who PAID to torture you?? The first scene with the drill made its mark on me and I'll never forget it. I didn't sleep for 4 days. Bravo Eli, Bravo.

I know I know theres a million other horror movies out there that you think are better but this is my list. And I'm all for the gore..... (cue the sick freak comments)

OK MBTA...Get Your Shit Together

Alright, I'll admit it, I'm a germaphobe. I hate being sick, and even worse, I hate the thought of getting sick from other people. I'm not the Danny Tanner type that's going to hover over the toilet seat when doing my business or wash a counter with Lysol 36 times a day, but I do have a slight fear. I wash my hands 20 times a day because people are nasty, and use purell whenever possible. I should be their spokesperson, but thats another time. The thing is, I am able to wash my hands at work because I am surrounded by bathrooms and purell stations.....but the way into work is another story. Have you ever been on the T??? It's a cesspool of bacteria. I am sick of looking at people who clearly haven't seen a bar of soap in a few weeks coughing all over themselves. Either NOT covering their mouths, or coughing into their hands. God only knows if they been picking their nose all morning or had an itchy butt. Its fucking gross because they put their hand right back on that pole. And, from my estimation, 15,000 people will touch that post every few days and now Mr. Never Used Jergens' germs have spread through 10 different T spots and god knows how many different ares in Boston. Do the math, thats a lot of grossness. This is not the problem. The problem is how and who cleans them at night. Do they wash the poles?? What about those rubber hanging grip things?? Do they check the seats for gum?? Any chance they can get rid of that urine smell off cart 3?? What about that weird brown stain on the door?? These are the questions we need answered. I am assuming that these people do not do a thorough job for they probably get paid about as well as a 3rd world child gets paid to go through trash piles. I'm also a realist and know there is no way to make sure every person in the world doesn't get sick, or learns to COUGH INTO THEIR ELBOW.... I'm not asking for that. I'm asking for purell touch free hand sanitizers on every train car, next to every door. Is that too much to ask?? Or maybe at each stop on the platform??? Come on T, do your part. It's not that much money and you could make it a tax write off. Because if I get sick from some idiot on the train, there will be hell to pay..... and by hell to pay, I mean I will write a nasty letter to the head of the MBTA that he probably won't even read. So, there.

Question of the Day

Would you buy a Frodo Baggi...erm, I mean Danny Woodhead jersey?

Redline Rider of the Day

Is that the new Louis Vuitton? And who says there are no real men left in America?

Guy Makes Cows Come

Boy, can this guy makes cows come or what??? Someones getting the good milk tomorrow!

Blogrates Throwback Jam

Mobb Deep f. Nas - It's Mine

Old School Rap City tag at the beginning. PRICELESS. Miss 'Rap City: The Bassment' what ever happened to that Big Tigga anyways? Those freestyle sessions when the show first started were DOPE.

Justice Served

...well, maybe not until they stick his nutsack in a vice grip. But if anyone was wondering why Theo Fleury seemed to suddenly morph into the Hurricane BLOW, I think we have found our answer.

Convicted Sex Offender Surrenders

The Beginning Of The End

First post in what I hope becomes a tool to get "wipe my ass with hunnids" rich.